Kinda Cute Little Fibbers
by CherryIce1988
Summary: Kenny, Cartman, Kyle, Stan and Craig were the best of friends until Kenny went missing. Now what happens 3 years later when the boys start getting creepy text messages from a mysterious "K"? Pretty Little Liars Parody set in South Park, Slight AU and kind of OOC please read and review!
1. Chapter 1

**AN: Ok this idea came to me late one night, and I was so excited about it I couldn't wait to write it, I know this Kenny is extremely out of character but I needed it to make sense to go with the pretty little liars theme here cuz Ali was a total Bitch, and it'll make sense later, also I don't own South Park or PLL so without further ado Kinda Cute, Little, Fibbers. **

_Don't be a Fibbing Fran Arnold, because a lie is a lie- Joseph Smith, The Book of Mormon_

You probably heard the story, innocent young boy goes missing, happens every day, although there was something different about this boy he was so much like you yet so much better. He was the boy all the girls wanted to date and all the guys wanted to be. Kenny McCormick was not only gorgeous he was also the most popular boy in all of South Park, at just 13 years he had already brought the small town to its knees despite his less than fancy living conditions he was loved by everyone (or so they thought). It no surprise that Stan Marsh, Eric Cartman, Kyle Broflovski and Craig Tucker all jumped at the opportunity to be his new best friends.

It all began one day at the annual Cow Days festival, the boys all knew it was hella lame but as usual their parents carted them around and forced them to attend the Running of the Cows. That's how it all began The boys had snuck away to play some of the carnival games, little did they know their lives would soon change forever. Kenny was an expert and was easily able to subtlety seduce them. He complemented Stan's performance on the football team, gazed in awe at Craig's artwork, showed an interests in Kyle's theories, and complimented Cartman's fashion sense. Yes, now the boys knew they were in with the cool crowd, they were untouchable.

Over the next year they were practically inseparable, doing everything together, playing the best pranks and throwing the best parties. It was at such a party that would change their lives forever, literally the party to end all parties. It was the night after the last day of school, they were celebrating that they would now be 8th graders and at the top of the school, they would even be able to attend some social functions at the high school. It was to be the best sleepover ever, Kyle's parents were finally letting him use the guest house for a sleep over, he had high hopes that when he got to high school he would be able to move in there permanently. The Boys all gathered in Kyle's yard "Now that were 8th graders I'm soo happy" Craig said. "Yeah I can't wait to go to the High School dances" said Cartman. "You better slim down if you wanna get a date Cartman, no girl want to be seen dancing with a total fat ass" snickered Kenny. Lately some of the boys had become annoyed with Kenny's constant put downs, of course no one would say anything for fear of losing their social status. "HEY FELLAS" they heard a voice call from across the street. "Oh God" Kenny said "Its Butters". Butters was a total loser who always wanted to be included in all their activities. "Hey Kenny, Kyle" Butters shouted "Whatcha guys up too" "Were having a sleepover to celebrate the end of the year" Kenny replied. "Cool mind if I join you?" "Sorry Butters" Said Kyle "My mom said I could only have four over but maybe next time." "Oh, well thanks anyway fellas" Butters walked away sadly. The friend limit was a total lie, but Kyle didn't care, Butters was a dork and hanging with him might bring down his social status. "God what a spaz ass" Kenny said and they all agreed with him although deep down they kind of felt bad. "Alright" Kenny said trying to uplift the spirits "You guys are in for a wild night here" "Were not going skinny dipping in Kyle's pool again are we?" said Stan gigling. "But Stan, that seemed to be your favorite activity." Said Kenny while winking "But no I've got a new Idea, but we need to go inside first." They all went inside while Kenny had a devious look on his face "Alright" he said as he started off "The guys on the swim team shared this awesome trick with me" Kenny loved shoving it in Kyle's face that he had been accepted onto the JV swim team over Kyle, the only 8th grader to be picked in fact. Kenny started to turn off all the lights "We are gonna try a hypnosis trick that will make you confess some of your deepest darkest secrets." Stan easily gave in, he was kinda like Kenny's little lap dog but also acted as his protector from anyone who talked trash about him. Cartman gave in as well, "It seems kinda scary" Said Craig. "Well I wouldn't expect anything from a scardy cat who still plays with his Guinea pig" sneered Kenny. "Don't you disrespect Stripes, he was a gift from my dad" said Craig "And yet you still play with him" Kenny shot back. With that Craig gave in to being hypnotized. Kenny began to hypnotize his 3 friends while Kyle just stood in the corner and rolled his eyes. Outside it soon became very dark and thunder could be heard. Kyle never liked to admit it but he didn't really like thunderstorms and began to start turning the lights back on. "Is there a problem Broflovski?" Kenny asked. "Don't you think it's a little too dark in here?" Kyle said "Someone could get hurt" "God don't be such a baby Kyle" Kenny snorted "Were just trying to have a little fun" "GET OUT!" Yelled Kyle. "Oh come on" Teased Kenny "I said out!" repeated Kyle. "Fine I'm going" yelled Kenny. The rest of the boys remained in a trance while Kyle followed him outside to continue the argument. The boys were so deep in their trance before they knew it, it was morning.

Stan was the first one to wake up when he noticed something was up. "Hey guys" he shouted, Craig and Cartman reluctantly woke up "Wheres Kyle and Kenny?" I don't know said Cartman but I had a strange dream about Kenny falling into Starks Pond" "I had that dream too" said Craig. "That's so weird" Just then Kyle came bursting through the door. "Where's Kenny?" asked Cartman. "I don't know." said Kyle "I spent the morning looking for him, he's probably hanging with his new swimming buddies" And that was the story each of the boys gave when Mrs McCormick called them that afternoon. They didn't become worried until the next day when Kenny still hadn't shown up the next day, it soon became the biggest story in the entire town. Posters of Kenny were plastered all over town and all summer it was all anyone could talk about. The boys had all been questioned by the police and their lives were changed forever, they were deeply upset over their best friend but also kind of relieved that Kenny could no longer black mail them with their secrets, although no one said this out loud. Over the summer the boys began to grow apart, but at least they were safe now from humiliation, at least for another 3 years.

**AN: Alright so what did everyone think, love it or hate it I wanna know, I want some honest feedback should I continue this or not, I feel kind of bad for making Kenny such a jerk, but seriously I really love reviews whether good or bad, and If the story makes no sense it's because I wrote this really late at night before bed so remember REVIEW!**


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: alright this is attempt number 2 I wonder if I should change the title name, I wonder if anyones still reading this Hello! Oh well onto the show**

Three years later, Eric Cartman sat in the food court of South Park mall with his best friend Butters. They had become best friends the summer Kenny went missing, after neither of them made the football team, that's when they decided maybe team sports weren't for them, they decided they would rule the school in another way. That summer their transformation began, Cartman lost a significant amount of weight and Butters began to dress less like a dork. They learned all the ways to attract the girls and make others jealous of them. Practically every day after school they would hang out and share the best gossip. Unfortunately Cartman was the butt of Butters jokes today. "I can't believe she actually signed a virginity pledge. God I figured she'd be one of the easiest girls in school." Butters was of course referring to the shocking news that last night during their movie night Cartman's girlfriend Bebe Stevens had announced she would be remaining a virgin until she was married. The worst part was it wasn't even a private conversation she made the announcement in front of everyone, it was totally embarrassing. "It won't last" Cartman said hopefully "It's just a fad, I bet a lot of the cheerleaders signed one and she just went along with it." "Well if you just keep saying something maybe eventually it'll come true." Butters shot back mockingly." "Whatever I think we need to take our minds off this It's time to do some back to school 'shopping'" Cartman said with a wink. "I've been waiting for this all day" Butters said with a grin. They did this all the time, and they couldn't explain the rush they felt. It started with small things at first candy and chips from Circle K but it built up to bigger and better things, a new pair of shoes at foot locker, some games from Game Stop, and here they were looking at watches at the jewelry store, "Can I see that one" Cartman said pointing at the Citizen, the clerk got the watch out for him to try on, before going helping out another customer. $1400 the price tag read, and into his pocket it went. Things were much more stylish when you weren't paying for it. Luckily the clerk was way to distracted helping a couple who wanted to look at every single anniversary band, Cartman looked at them with a sense of envy, he hoped someday he could love someone like that, his thoughts were soon interrupted by Butters who had scored a gold Modovo. They both grabbed a pair of sunglasses before running out the door, both feeling like they had gotten away with murder

**Alright so that's part 2, I'll hopefully have part 3 up soon, I don't wanna spend too long on the introduction stories, remember to review, it helps my crack addiction haha get it**


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: Alright hopefully this will be the last time I ever have to write these notes just wanna say I think I am definatly moving towards an Alternate universe, on the show Ike is about 5-6 years younger but now I think he'll be about 3 years younger, 13 years old and entering High School Kyle is 16 and entering Junior year**

Kyle Broflovski had finally done it, he was finally moving into guest house, it would serve as his apartment for the next 2 years. And probably weekends when he would come back from college. Although he was still technically living under his parent roof he felt a sense of independence. See even though Kyle was the oldest child, it seemed like he was always living in his little brother's shadow. His Adopted Canadian brother Ike was a certifiable Genius. He loved his brother with all his heart but it could be a little frustrating always trying to measure up. Although Kyle was in the running for the valedictorian in his class, Ike had been so smart he had been promoted a grade. Kyle got elected vice president of his class, Ike was president. Kyle was going insane trying to compete in 600 different activities, Ike seemed to pull it off with a breeze. Kyle didn't want to sound ungrateful of his parents, after all they had just bought him a brand new Mercedes for his 16th birthday but for some reason he felt his parents gave Ike more. Now that they would be in High School together it felt that he would be compared against Ike even more. At least now in his new "apartment" He felt he could escape here and be alone, finally he felt safe from the rest of the world. He looked out the window to get a good view of this place, he thought he saw a flash of blonde, he did a double take and realized his mind must of just been playing tricks on him.

AN: **This one was incredibly short but don't worry Kyle will have a much larger role later in the story, only 2 more introduction chapters to go please please please revie**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Ok here's the next part, I'm definitely classifying it as AU now, although more references to the show here Just trying to prove **

Stan sat inside trying to recover from today's football practice. Coach had been exceptionally tough on them today so there was nothing more Stan wanted to chill out and watch some mindless tv. It was the last day of summer and he felt there was no better way to spend it. MTV was showing a marathon of Jersey Shore, Stan remembered that time the Jersey Shore freaks invaded South Park, it turned out that Kyle had a little Jersey in him himself, Kenny mocked him mercilessly for weeks. It was a kind of traumatic event but Stan looked back on it fondly It was one of the interesting adventures they had, the supernatural was not out of the in South Park. Stan sat there reminiscing for a few minutes before Sharon walked into the room, Sharon had taken to making baskets for new neighbors that moved in shortly after she lost her job at Toms Rhinoplasty, this was her way of coping. "Stanley, I need you to take some cookies to the new family that moved up the street." Stan knew exactly which house she meant; it was Kenny's old house. About a year ago someone had finally bought the property and the demolishing soon began, Kenny's old shack had been replaced with a stunning McMansion, it seemed to be all anyone in town would talk about, but to Stan it just brought back painful, painful memories. Stan begrudgingly got up and went to deliver the cookies.

"Well Hello There what can I do you for?" An overly excited boy about Stan's age answered the door. "Oh hey" Stan said nervously "I'm Stan, I brought some cookies over to welcome your family to the neighborhood." "Oh that's swell, my name's Gary I just moved here from Utah with my parents and 5 brothers and sisters, my parents are away right now but I'll be sure to give them the basket." "Ok" Stan said as he turned to leave. As he started down the drive way he noticed something on the curb. It was a box full of Kenny's old things, mostly his notebooks and textbooks from school. Stan looked through these with a sense of sadness, here were the final remains of Kenny right in this box, it was like his whole life was summed up right here.

"You can have those if you want" A voice behind him said.

Stan jumped and turned around to see Gary.

"I mean you can have them if you want, the contruction workers found them before they demolished, I didn't find much use for them" said Gary. "Did you know him?"

"I used to" Stan said surprised Gary hadn't yet heard the story, but one day at South Park High and he'll feel like her personally lived through the event.

Stan took a good look at Gary, he was kind of intriguing despite his obvious dorkishness. He was a simple looking boy although attractive and nice enough too, though Stan believed this kid was part of some strange religious movement. Stan couldn't believe he was about to do what he did next, something that Kenny (and most likely the others) would have ripped on him mercilessly for.

"Hey Gary, I don't know if you'd be interested or anything but since your new in town, I'm wondering if maybe you'd like me to show you around and walk you to school tomorrow?" Stan said almost immediately regretting it.

"Sure Stan, That sounds great I'll see you bright and early tomorrow morning." Gary replied enthusiastically.

"Alright that sounds awesome, see you tomorrow at 7." Stan said while waving goodbye, maybe he'd finally found someone he could just chill with, and he hadn't found anyone like this in a while.

**AN: Alright that's Stan's introduction now I only have to introduce Craig before the fun can begin, as always please read and review**


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: Alright now I gotta warn you guys on what's coming up here, I got an OC coming up, and I'm trying very hard not to make her a Mary Sue, Some ethical dilemmas ensue but the show must go on, and away we go, also sorry it took so long, I finally got a copy of the New PLL book and I had to read it then I had to study for my test and I've just been slacking off over here, enjoy**

Craig walked into his first class on the first day of school, he spent no time catching up with anyone because to tell you the truth Craig didn't have many friends his age. Craig though t the rest of his classmates were losers . Even his old friends Kyle, Stan and Cartman seemed lame to him after Kenny went missing. Kyle seemed to care about nothing else but being involved in 600 activities because it would look good on his college application. As for Stan all he cared about was football, he was the schools star quarterback and therefore too popular for Craig. Cartman was incredibly popular too but he was even worse. Cartman turned into the biggest jerk since them, he and Butters walked around like they were hot shit. Craig had no use for them anymore.

That was not to say Craig was anti-social, he just hated the Typical South Park kids. Craig liked to go to the clubs in Denver during the weekends, he had a fake ID that got him in everywhere. This past weekend had been particularly exciting. He had hooked up with this incredibly sexy older woman, he wouldn't call her a cougar though because he assumed she was probably only 4 or 5 years older than him but damn was she fine she had big tits and sexy blonde hair, she was kinda curvalicious if you want to be technical about it. Craig was used to hooking up with girls at the clubs before but most of them were bar trash who would bang anything that walked, not that Craig was exactly complaining on the other hand, but this girl was different the kind that didn't come along everyday.

Of course Craig had to keep himself from daydreaming for a bit, after all today was the first day of school, everything was as usual. Cartman and Butters were making fun of how people were dressed, though Craig thought Cartman shouldn't be making fun of others right now, if the rumors were true about his girlfriend's new club membership. Lady Karma certainly could be a bitch. He saw Kyle already putting up flyers for the first dance of the school year sponsored by the student government; the dance wasn't even for a month away. Of course Kyle seemed to be all alone in this effort, at that point Craig felt it was safe to say their fearless Class President Wendy Testaberger would be hand in hand with his final former friend Stan Marsh. Only when he saw Stan he didn't see Wendy at all. Stan was with someone else, a blonde boy he had never seen before but Stan sure seemed to like him. Oh well he didn't have time to worry about the exploits of his loser ex-friends he had to get to class.

Mr. Garrison Stood at the front of the class and wrote their English assignment on the board, read the first 30 pages of _50 Shades of Grey_ and be ready for a quiz tomorrow. Craig didn't understand why Mr. Garrison insisted on moving up with the boys all these years, I mean come on dude time to move on. After Mr Garrison spent about five minutes gushing about the new book, Mr. Mackey entered the room to make an announcement. Mr. Mackey was at the high school too, but now he was the new principal, for a couple of years he acted as both principal and guidance counselor, but this year the school board was hiring a new full time guidance counselor, Mackey explained. "Class I'd like you meet you're new guidance counselor mmkay, she's a recent Regis University Graduate please welcome Miss Claire Perkins mmmkay." Craig looked up and his eyes nearly fell out of their sockets, the new counselor was his sexy hookup from over the weekend. She was looking directly at him as well, her jaw was dropped. "What the fuck!" she exclaimed. And the whole class turned to look at Craig. Just then he got a text message

Craig, it looks like you two should have thought about lying in your bed before you made it-K

What the fuck indeed.

**AN: Ok that's it for now, unless you really want more, in that case Im gonna need to get some more reviews (wink wink) seriously if you guys review Ill continue if not, Im wondering if anyones actually reading so please review if you love it or even if you hate it**


	6. Chapter 6

Cartman was in his room "studying" but that was just code for making out with Bebe, it was the first time they had spoken since she decided to go all super virgin on him. Cartman would try desperately to get in her pants any way he knew how though. He slowly moved his hand up her skirt, but she quickly brushed his hand away. "I told you, I'm not ready for that." She said with a smirk. Cartman thought she was mocking him. "Anyways its getting late I should get going, but were still going to Token's party on Friday after the game right?" "Yeah, I'll see you then." Bebe kissed him goodbye before turning on her heels and walking out the door. Token's parties were legendary, his lack of parental supervision lead to underage drinking, which often times lead to embarrassing hookups. Cartman figured maybe this would be a good way to get to Bebe, then maybe he might be able to get everyone off his back about the whole thing.

Cartman didn't want to dwell on this all night however so he went downstairs to watch tv and grab a snack, he turned on the TV and Terrance and Phillip was on. He couldn't believe he used to like this show it was so stupid a bunch of guys farting around seriously. Still, watching it reminded him of his old friends, Kenny loved this show more than any of them, Cartman thought back to a time when they paid a homeless guy to get them into the Terrance and Phillip movie. He got lost in the moment reminiscing about the olden days, back when he could be cool just for being himself (ok just for being friends with Kenny), before he had to practically put on an act just for people to fear him.

He was brought back down to earth by the sound of a doorbell. "MOM, ANSWER THE GODDAMN DOOR" he yelled. Well at least some things never change. "Coming poopsiekins!" Lianne Cartman though now aging was still considered attractive by mom standards, Cartman swore Craig Tucker still had a little crush on her, he was always into older women after all. Hell half the kids in school would still fuck Lianne given the chance, her reputation was legendary to this day. Despite all that Cartman loved his mother and knew she would do anything for anything for her little baby, which was about to come in handy at a time like now. "Eric Cartman, we got a call from South Park Mall Security. You're gonna have to come with me." He felt his pocket buzzing and pulled out his phone

Eric, next time you decide to take a "shopping" trip don't forget, your old friend may want to tag along-K

The Cuffs went on as soon as he finished reading the text and from there he blacked out.

**AN:OK that was not as good as I hoped, promise I will take a departure from PLL in the next chapter or 2, its just that Cartman is such a Hanna, Also it may be a while til the next chapter, so r&r you know the deal guys**


	7. Chapter 7

"Thanks for walking me home Stan, do you want to come in and play some games with my brothers and sisters?" Gary asked enthusiastically. It killed Stan not to say yes he knew he better not, besides he had a legitimate reason. "Gee, I'd really love to Gary but I've gotta get back to school for football practice."

"You mean you walked me home even though you had practice? Stan you really didn't have to do that."

"Gary, I Promised you I would, besides its nothing. I just want you to feel welcome since you're new to town."

"Well thanks Stan, You really do know how to make a guy feel welcome." Gary said while smiling at him. Oh God, that smile made him just melt, Although Stan should not be feeling this way anymore, he wasn't gay he had a girlfriend now, he was with Wendy the girl he'd always had a crush on, I mean his crush on Kenny was just a passing fad after all it didn't actually mean anything, It was just Kenny after all, the guy was down right gorgeous. Oh no not these thoughts again he had to think unsexy thoughts.

It was after his whole crisis of conscience moment that Stan realized Gary was still there. It was time to come back down to earth.

"So uh Gary, um would you like to come to come to my football game on Friday, after that Token Black is having this huge party, you can tag along if you want"

"Stan, that sounds awesome, I guess I'll see you on Friday, good luck at practice, and good luck on your game." Gary said to him cheerfully.

"Thanks" Stan shouted back hurrying to get back to school for football practice, he knew he would be late but he could afford to be late once in a while. He actually wished he could have skipped practice completely today, there was something about Gary that intrigued him, maybe it was his always cheerful disposition that was contagious. But Stan also knew the feelings he had for Gary were very inappropriate, he knew Wendy would murder him if she ever found out what he was thinking and that Gary most likely didn't swing that way either.

Stan once again trapped in his thoughts was brought back down to earth this time by a giggle. He looked around to see who it could be but no one was around, he could of sworn however that he saw a flash of blonde hair but decided he was just seeing things so he just turned around and kept on walking.

**AN:Ok that one was written super-fast, always remember kids quantity over quality, at least that's the theme of my writing, also I'm wondering if any artistic folks out there would be willing to make me a cover for this story, I would do it myself but I am artistically challenged so PM me or put something in the reviews if you are interested no pressure though, and as always tell me what you thought of this story **


	8. Chapter 8

On the second day of school Craig knew he had to confront Claire, er Miss Perkins about their secret relationship. Although it really wasn't even a relationship, it was just some random hook up. But what really freaked him out was the weird text message he received. Someone knew about his hookup with Claire, how could someone have known about all that? I mean obviously someone could have seen him at the club but how would they know he was a student at South Park High, or that Claire would be the new guidance counselor, and why did someone follow him to Denver, could he really have a stalker or was this just one big prank, but who would care that much about Craig to do this to him, True he didn't have many friends in South Park but he didn't have many enemies either, at least not that he knew of. But he didn't have time to worry about that right now He had to deal with this Claire situation before the authorities got involved and he was on the cover of every tabloid in America .

He arrived at her office as soon as he could in the morning, he didn't really want anyone to see he was visiting, although did anyone really suspect sure ever since class yesterday he felt his ears burning whenever he walked passed anyone, but was he just being paranoid? Before he could start worrying about that creepy text again, she had arrived.

"Craig, hi is there something I can help you with." She said with a noticeable nervousness in her voice.

"Hey Claire, I mean Miss Perkins um, Could we maybe talk in private?"

She sighed, clearly uncomfortable with the situation.

"Sure Craig, I guess I could do that for you"

She lead him into her office, and almost regrettingly shut the door.

"Craig, I think I know what you want to talk about. God it's like the 800 pound gorilla in the room, look last weekend was a lot of fun but it can't happen again, you're a student of mine now and this relationship just isn't gonna work. I hope there are no hard feelings between us."

Craig was a little surprised she was taking this so well, a one night stand that would remain that way. He was a little disappointed though, finally the first girl he felt a real connection to and it all had to end, just because she was her teacher. She was beautiful and intelligent; she had real depth to her unlike many of the girls his age.

"I understand Miss Perkins, I just wanted to talk to you to make sure that I have absolutely no intention of continuing this relationship." Craig said wishing it weren't true " I just don't want any weirdness between us at school. Let's leave it in the past."

The both stood in the awkward silence for a few minutes neither wanting to be the first to say goodbye, before each of them knew it they were kissing. KISSING AT SCHOOL! KISSING A TEACHER AT SCHOOL! It was like Craig's dreams had come true. Craig though he heard a creepy giggle outside the window but paid no attention as he continued kissing Claire.

**AN: do I even need one of these? Just review me pleez! Also the next part will be written much later, Kyle is incredibly hard to write for, so if you have any ideas please send them this way**


	9. Chapter 9

Friday night had come already. Everyone in town was at the home opener game, everyone but Kyle that is. Despite living in his own "apartment" he suddenly felt more pressured than ever. It was Junior year the year that counted most to potential Colleges. Kyle was looking into going to an East Coast Ivy League school, far away from this hick town. When Kyle was younger he looked to living in the guesthouse he would have his friends over all the time and there would be fun parties practically every night. Yeah that was totally not happening anytime in the future. Tonight he was working on an story for AP English, god how he hated that class, it almost made him wish he could be in regular English with Mr. Garrison, Almost. Kyle could understand writing papers based on whatever they were reading but this lady wanted them to write their own stories, she was a creative writing kind of lady which drove Kyle absolutely nuts. Not only did she expect them to write stories with tons of symbolism, and if it's obvious what you're aiming for its really not symbolism according to her. She also expected them to share with the rest of the class what they had written. It was incredibly embarrassing, although it was kind of interesting to see what some people were writing. If you listened carefully you could learn what was going on in someone's life. Wendy Testaburger's stories were particularly that of interest, it seemed that her relationship with Stan was only perfect on the surface. She tended to write stories about women who were in unsatisfactory relationships and would have risqué affairs. It sounded like Stan wasn't satisfying her needs, or maybe he was just reading too much into it. Because of this, Kyle made sure his stories never had any connection to his own life, he usually wrote about historical events, period pieces were very popular right now anyways. His teacher appreciated the pop culture allusions but she just felt that they weren't genuine enough and lacked the passion. Kyle sat there staring at a blank screen having the worst writers block ever. He had been planning to write a story taking place in the 1970s, one of the more overlooked decades in American history but felt that it just wouldn't give him a better grade than usual. He was so desperate he had even considered stealing one of Ike's stories and passing it off on his own, but he later realized that that was something that was such a teen drama cliché. He didn't even know where to begin.

After spacing out for a while Kyle got an Idea. If that teacher wanted real High School Drama he would give it to her. He checked the clock, 9:45, He missed the football game but Token's party would still be in full swing. Little did Kyle know he wouldn't be the only one doing an investigation tonight, someone else would be following him, documenting his every move.

**AN: Alright, I finally got Kyles story up, I totally was gonna go the whole Melissa/Spencer route with Kyle and Ike but I changed my mind don't worry there will be some drama between them. It may be some time before the next chapter because I'm going on vacation, so as always please read and review**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Guess whos back, yeah I got a job and was in school and practically forgot about this, so for the 2 of you who are actually reading, onto the main event.**

This was the moment Stan had been waiting for practically all his life, he was finally the starting quarterback of the South Park Varsity Football team. He had been a proud Cow all his life, despite their fruity name, and finally he was starting quarterback. Everything was perfect tonight his parents were in the crowd cheering him on. His girlfriend was on the sidelines cheering for him, he had even convinced Gary to come to his game. It was great to have a new guy friend now after the rest of them had moved on. The worst part of the evening turned out to be that the game was a typical South Park game, a total dud where the Cows got the living shit beaten out of them, Stan just hoped that eventually the would win at some point.

After the game Gary came up to him "Hey, Stan sorry you didn't win the game, don't worry you'll get 'em next time." God why did Gary always have to be so fucking cheerful? "Thanks Gary" Stan replied dejectedly he had really hoped Gary could get to see him win. About a second later Wendy snuck up behind him and gave him a big hug. "Hey Stan, you did great out there tonight" She gushed. Ah Wendy, you could always count on her to lie in order to spare your feelings. Stan looked over to see his biggest fans "So you guys wanna go get a milkshake or something?" he asked them awkwardly. "Sorry Stan." Wendy said apologetically "The girls and I are going over to Token's party tonight, you should come too, its gonna be epic." Stan had always been a little Jealous of Token, ever since Wendy left Stan for him in 4th grade, there was no way Stan was sitting this one out. "I wouldn't miss it for the world" Stan said with a forced smile. "Great" Wendy cheerfully replied "See you there" She turned and skipped away running off to the rest of the cheerleaders. Stan just stood there dumbfounded he couldn't believe what he'd just agreed to, he wasn't exactly Token's biggest fan. Suddenly he realized something Gary was still standing there waiting for his ride home. "So uh Gary, do you wanna tag along with me to this party?" Gary just smiled as usual "Sure, Stan I think this will be a nice way for me to get to know everyone." Good ole Gary finding the positive in everything, he was a good friend to keep around. As they walked to the car Stan couldn't help but feel like someone was following them, oh well he was probably just being paranoid again.

**A/N: "We waited 2 months for this drivel?" Sorry guys, I know Im a total slacker, theres just this other story Im reading where the author updates twice a day, it put me to shame so I figured I better get my butt in gear, hope you enjoyed, there will be more to come please review!**


	11. Chapter 11

It had been a rough week for Cartman, he was carted off to South Park jail and forced to answer some questions, luckily his mother was able to help him out but he'd rather not say how she was able to do this, and Cartman was able to get off with community service. Butters received the same punishment from the law but Cartman knew his parents would be much harsher on him.

As usual however Butters had found a way to sneak out and go to this party. Butters had come a long way since they were boys and Butters was deathly afraid of them nowadays he seemed downright defiant.

Cartman was a man on a mission tonight, he and Bebe were finally gonna do it, Virginity pledges be damned.

Yes it was true that he had been drinking a lot tonight, and not just beer, he had been hitting the Jack pretty strong tonight as well. But wasn't that what was supposed to happen at Token's parties? Anyways its not like he was the only one, this was perfect everyone's inhibitions were being lowered, it was time to seek out Bebe.

It wouldn't be easy to find her of course it seemed everyone and their brother was here tonight, he saw Stan and that weird new blonde kid they were always together now, it probably pissed Wendy off a lot which was amusing to Cartman.

Kyle was here too even though this was definitely not his scene. Cartman figured Jew boy would be studying because he wouldn't want to lose his spot at valedictorian to Wendy Testaberger, but she was probably here too Cartman figured.

In fact it wasn't long before he spotted Wendy, she was with the other cheerleaders it was how he found Bebe. She was standing there with the rest of them giggling it up. Cartman knew there was some reason he fell in love with her in the first place, but seeing her here he didn't really understand. She looked just like another cheerleader who fell off the assembly line now.

Whatever, he was just not himself now, it was time to make his move.

"Hey Bebe I've been looking for you all night"

Bebe turned around to see who it was, she smiled when she noticed her boyfriend. "Hey Eric, I was worried you wouldn't show up tonight, it seemed like you've been avoiding me all week."

She had partly been right, Cartman felt weird around her ever since the whole announcement. "Oh, I've been so busy lately" He lied "You wanna go somewhere a little more private?" She smiled and he led the way.

It wasn't exactly hard to find an empty room around here, they quickly started making out. Cartman saw it as a good sign he started to unzip his pants then slid his hands up her skirt trying to remove her panties. It took a millisecond before she pulled away.

"What are you doing?" Bebe angrily asked

"Bebe, we've been together for 2 years now, I think it's time we took things to the next level" Cartman tried to reason

"Eric, I made a pledge to save myself for my wedding night, does that mean anything to you?"

He couldn't believe it, she was absolutely serious. "Bebe, it can be our little secret, I promise I won't say a word no one will have to know."

"But I'll know, and I didn't take this pledge for nothing this is important to me and I want it to be important to you as well."

"I have needs, doesn't that mean anything to you, any girl in school would want to get with this, I bet any of those skanks downstairs would be willing" He shouted at her

"Fuck you asshole." She yelled back at him "And don't even think of calling me again." She screamed as she stormed out of the room.

Cartman couldn't believe what just happened, he had a crush on her since he was 13, he worked so hard over the past three years to get her and he lost her in a matter of minutes. Suddenly he heard his phone buzz

Cartman, how does it feel that even after you lost all weight and became popular, she still sees you as that fat loser you once were-K

Seriously, this was getting old how the fuck could someone have known that so quick? Cartman had to get out of there. He grabbed a bottle of Jack and his keys and just drove.


	12. Chapter 12

It was a little after 11 on Friday night, half the school was at Token's big party making bad choices. But not Craig, he was making possibly an even worse choice, he was heading over to Claire's apartment.

This had become much more than just a random flame, Craig certainly was smitten with her, he was even afraid he was falling in love. Claire was the perfect woman, she was beautiful, intelligent and a great conversationalist. It totally sucked that she had to be a teacher at his school.

However tonight he felt like he could finally be free, the two of them could be together without fear that someone could be watching, even if those creepy K messages were upsetting.

He knocked on her door, hoping she was home, he hadn't exactly told her he was coming over. She opened the door after a few seconds, dressed in yoga pants and a Regis t-shirt. She had her hair pulled up in a bun as well, Craig couldn't help but still be enamored with her even dressed down like this.

"What are you doing here Craig?" She asked him sternly, not at all pleased to see him.

" I can't stop thinking about you Claire, it's not just a simple crush that I can just get over, I think I may have true feelings for you."

"Craig, you're only 16, I'm saying this to you as your guidance councellor, you're too young for all this, and are you aware I could get in serious trouble for this."

"Age ain't nothing but a number Claire-"

"It's Miss Perkins to you, Craig, from now on I am your teacher and nothing else. This isn't love it's just a simple schoolboy crush"

She didn't get it, Craig had been with several girls before her but all of them were forgettable fucks, she was the only one he even cared to remember.

"Can we at least talk about it?" he asked with pleading eyes.

She sighed and stepped aside to let him in, a small laugh could be heard in the distance but right now that was the furthest thing on his mind.


	13. Chapter 13

Kyle had had just about enough of this stupid party. It was nothing new and everything he expected it to be. People getting insanely drunk and making out with whomever they could find. Wendy Testaberger and the rest of the girls were all giggling about something, sometimes Kyle couldn't believe that that was the girl who out did him at everything, it just didn't make sense.

He was seriously ready to haul ass and get the hell out of there, but first he really had to use the bathroom. The problem was that when he got there he found he wasn't alone. Bebe Stevens sit on the floor sobbing hysterically.

"Oh I'm sorry, I didn't know, um bye." Kyle said frantically trying to get out as soon as possible.

"Wait, Im sorry I'll get out, I should probably just go home anyway" She cried out. It was then Kyle noticed she had a bottle of vodka in her hands and it didn't look like she had just started drinking either.

"How are you getting home?" he asked

"Well I was gonna catch a ride back with Cartman but-" Her eyes started welling up with tears just at the mention of the name.

Kyle sighed, he always felt Cartman didn't deserve her. Frankly he was horrified to even think about what might have happened. However he knew what he had to do.

"Bebe, do you want me to give you a ride home?" Kyle asked almost regretfully

"Well, you don't have to I'm sure I can wait for Wendy or-"

"Come on you need to get home right now."

She went with him and didn't think twice, Kyle was one of the good boys, she never needed to fear him.

In the car, Bebe told this story about how Cartman had been trying to get her to have sex with him despite her repeatedly telling him about her virginity pledge. He honestly couldn't believe Bebe would be the type of girl to take that kind of pledge, he always pictured her being the wild type, she even claimed this was the first time she had ever gotten drunk, boy you think you know someone only to be thrown for a loop.

Bebe didn't want to face her mother in this condition so Kyle decided to let her spend the night in the guest house, no funny business of course. He let her spend the night in his bed while he took the floor.

He couldn't believe it. Bebe Stevens, one of the hottest girls in school, was sleeping in his bed. If Cartman ever found out about this he would be so dead.

A/N: Well that's that, I don't know when I'll write the next chapter, I need to figure out what I'm doing with Stan still, But until then please review, maybe it will inspire me a little more


	14. Chapter 14

A/N: Don't hate Stan is hard to write

It was a little after one when Stan decided to call it a night. This Party had proved to be all flash and no substance. The most exciting part was Cartman and Bebe's fight which they probably thought no one could here. Stan would probably hear all the gossip from Wendy tomorrow.

Wendy had been another story tonight. At first Stan had been just chilling with Gary, then Wendy decided to drunkenly come up to him and start wildly making out, they ended up in one of the bedrooms. At first they were talking, or rather Wendy was babbling on until she eventually passed out. At some point Stan fell asleep too which was where he was right now, waking up in one of the spare rooms.

He knew it was time to go home but first he had to find Gary. Stan felt a pang of guilt knowing he shouldn't have left the poor boy alone all night, he didn't know anyone else at this party he was probably feeling left out and alone.

Stan's guilt was assuaged when he spotted Gary talking to none other than the Host of this Party Token. It appeared Gary was helping Token clean up a bit, he always appeared friendly towards people. Token seemed grateful for his help and was even laughing at something Gary had said.

"Hey, you ready to go?" Stan asked.

"Hey Stan, I was just helping Token clean up for the night, But I'm ready to go whenever you are."

Dammit, this boy was just too flippin cheerful. Stan was the kind of guy who saw everything as total shit. For some reason though he found himself more and more attracted to it though, maybe he hoped it would rub off on him.

Their car ride home was interesting to say the least. Gary talked about everyone he had met at the party and how much of a good time he had, Stan of course had a mixture of guilt and jealousy. Had he not gone off with Wendy he knew he would have had a much better time.

Oh My God, did he actually just think that?

He walked Gary to his door.

"I had sooo much fun tonight Stan, Thanks for taking me to that party everyone was super awesome."

Stan had fully intended to say goodnight but-

HOLY SHIT HE WAS KISSING GARY. HOW THE HELL DID THIS HAPPEN?!

The weird thing was he could have sworn Gary was kissing him back.

Stan didn't want to find out what happened next he bolted to his car and took off, he thought he heard a familiar creepy giggle, but right now he was hoping it was just his mind playing tricks on him.

**So that's that, told you it would suck, sigh, Stan why are you so hard to write for?**


	15. Chapter 15

What a night.

Kyle had never experienced something quite like this before. Bebe Stevens, possibly the hottest girl in school was sleeping in his bed. Not that they had done anything, Kyle had of course slept on the futon in the living area of the guest house, but still how many guys could admit that Bebe Stevens had slept in their bed? Not many, considering what she had confided in him last night, certainly not Cartman after all this. Somehow that made Kyle smile, that asshole finally got what he deserved.

She looked so angelic laying there he thought, sure he had always had a little bit of a crush on her but not exactly pining away. She was Cartman's girl since freshman year, and he would kill Kyle if he ever found out she spent the night here. He supposed it was time to wake her up and take her home.

"RISE AND SHINE SLEEPING BEAUTY" he yelled at her.

Oh God, did he actually just say that, that was so lame.

She seemed to be struggling to open her eyes, but when she finally did she was apparently frightened by her surroundings.

"Kyle? What are you doing here? What happened? Where am I?"

"You're at my place" He said wondering if that sounded sophisticated and grown up to her. "What exactly do you remember about last night."

"The last thing I really remember was telling Eric to go fuck himself because he wasn't getting anything from me, then I started drinking a bit and I guess I was talking to you. I don't remember coming here though."

Kyle had to smile at that

"Well you were pretty toasted last night; I guess you'd wanna get home now?"

"Actually if you don't mind I'd really like to take a shower first, is that alright."

HOLY SHIT BEBE STEVENS WANTED TO TAKE A SHOWER IN HIS GUEST HOUSE.

"Yeah, That's fine."

"Great thanks." And she ran off.

Bebe Stevens was showering in his house, he wanted to post something about this on Facebook so bad, everyone would be so jealous. But he couldn't, it wouldn't be fair to her and Cartman would seek a sweet revenge, well there has to be a downside to everything.

Kyle sat in the living room pretending to watch TV, he couldn't really focus when he kept thinking about how Bebe was naked in his shower. She emerged in the living room a few minutes later. She had traded out her cheerleading uniform for a pair of his jeans and one of his t-shirts.

"I hope you don't mind me borrowing this, I just didn't want to go home in my Cheerleading uniform, the walk of shame is just too trashy for me."

"No, its no big deal." Holy Crap was this actually happening to him "You ready to go now?"

"Yep, thanks so much for taking care of me last night. I owe you one big time."

Bebe Stevens, the girl was one surprise after another.

The drive home was somewhat awkward, but what was he supposed to say to her. Everything he thought knew about her had been disproved in the last 24 hours. Since South Park was such a small town it wasn't long before they reached her house.

"Thanks again Kyle, for making sure I was taken care of last night, you are the best."

"Its nothing, I only did what was necessary."

"Well thanks again." And in an instant she leaned over to give him a peck on the cheek before getting out of the car.

Kyle just sat there in shock for a few minutes until something caught his eye. A flash of blonde raced past him it reminded him of something similar he had seen a few days ago.


	16. Chapter 16

This had been a first for Craig. By no means was he a virgin, but this was the first time he had ever spent the night at any girls house. Claire must be the perfect girl, although he was only 16, he could already picture marriage, ok maybe he was jumping the gun a bit there but he felt something for her he had never ever felt for anyone else, if only he were about 7 years older.

Claire was already up he noticed. He wondered if he should go find her or sneak out while she was away. No sneaking out was something the old Craig would do he was a new man now.

Claire was in the kitchen her face in her hands, it looked like she had been crying.

"What's wrong?" Craig asked very concerned

"This is all a big mistake Craig and you know it." She said back at him

"But Claire, I've never felt this way about anyone before, Claire you may be the one"

"Craig, I am way too old for you, and I'm basically your teacher. Did you know I could go to jail for all this."

"But Claire I love-"

"Don't say it Craig, now this was fun I have to admit, and maybe some other time this would have worked out, but right now you and I both know this is wrong."

"I understand" Craig said with a bit of sadness about him.

Craig left the apartment and walked to his car. He couldn't believe what had just happened.

As soon as he got in his car he began to cry. Why was he doing that, Craig wasn't that kind of person, but he seemed to be tearing up the whole ride home. He couldn't believe this was happening to him, could he have been right about her being the love of his life, maybe but he certainly didn't want her getting fired, the sacrifices we must make for our loved ones.

As soon as he got home Craig ran straight up to his room and flopped out on his bed wanting to die.

He laid in bed for about 15 minutes until his phone started to vibrate.

He hoped it was Claire telling him she was sorry and really wanted to continue their relationship. But instead it was from a restricted number

Craig's Heart sank when he started to read it.

Craig, I've heard of the teacher's pet but aren't we getting a little carried away here?-K

Attached below was a picture of Craig standing outside Claire's apartment complex. It wasn't just idle threats anymore, someone out there had it in for him.


	17. Chapter 17

**Sorry this took so long, I had totally wanted to get this out in time for Halloween but I just let time get away from me, anyways please enjoy this next chapter**

Cartman woke up the next day in the hospital with his mother and Butters at his bedside. He noticed a clock in the room, it was about a quarter til 1. What the hell was he doing here.

"Eric, we need to have a serious talk." His mother told him in a stern tone. "Butters I think it would be best if you left now."

"Yes, mam." Butters said politely before turning to leave. Cartman saw him shoot him a little smirk before he exited the room. It seemed he had everyone fooled and only Cartman knew the truth.

"Alright Eric, you are already in trouble for shoplifting and now you've wrecked your car while intoxicated, your drivers license will most likely be suspended for 6 months but I've convinced Officer Barbrady to not press anymore charges against you if you volunteer at the animal shelter-"

"But mom-"

"Not one word Eric, you are incredibly lucky I was able to get this deal for you, now in addition to your volunteer work you will also be working a part time job in order to pay off the damage you did to the car and the things you shoplifted, doffer you a position on the weekend. Now if you'll excuse me I need to talk to someone about getting you discharged."

Cartman couldn't believe his mother was putting him through this. Volunteering at the animal shelter, how embarrassing, not to mention the wrench it threw into his social life.

Cartman picked up his phone he knew he was gonna have to make amends with Bebe after last night. He check on her Facebook page and noticed she had changed her relationship status to "single" He sighed perhaps this would take a little more work than he had previously thought. His phone pinged a new text message.

"Eric, it's amazing how quickly you can be replaced, like you were never even there at all-K"

Attached was a picture of Bebe kissing KYLE?!

Cartman knew one thing for certain, in addition to the shoplifting and DUI charges, Murder might be added on top that after tomorrow.


	18. Chapter 18

Wendy had stopped by Saturday night with details of Cartman and Bebe splitting up, and rumor had it Bebe had been spotted leaving with Kyle shortly thereafter, Wendy kept obsessing over it and although Bebe tried to deny anything was going on there, Wendy could have sworn Bebe had a bit of a crush on Kyle.

As much as Stan should have been excited about this new gossip about his former friends, he couldn't stop thinking about the kiss with Gary, why did he do it and what did it mean?

Was he gay? Sure he had a bit of a crush on Ken- no don't even think of that, he was just 13 and confused. Really what 13 year old boy doesn't hit on everything that walks.

Was he still thinking about this, his girlfriend was sitting on his bed talking to him and his mind was on the boy across the street. He had the whole house to himself; he and Wendy could fuck right now, which come to think about it why hadn't they? Wendy had never really even brought up the subject despite them dating on and off for almost 6 years. Did she know something about him he didn't?

Saturday night ended with Wendy going home at around 10 and giving Stan only a chaste kiss on the lips. It seemed it had been this way for a while. Sure there was the occasional Make out session but they hadn't even made out in months, and as far as Stan knew Wendy, unlike Bebe, wasn't one of the girls who made a chastity vow. So what was it, did Wendy just consider him her gay best friend, is that how the rest of the world saw them too?

Stan barely got to sleep that night trying to figure it all out. He wondered what he would do about Gary, should he remain friends with the boy? Should he avoid him at all costs?

He wondered what Gary thought of the kiss, would he tell everyone what had happened so everyone else would make fun of him? Or was it possible Gary felt the same way? Then he considered what this would mean about him and Wendy, were they really dating after all or just friends with benefits, albeit very little benefits. Stan came up with the conclusion he should just talk to Gary in the morning, it would all make sense then, he'd simply explain to Gary that the kiss was just something that happened in the heat of the moment, and meant nothing. He might even tell a little white lie about being slightly intoxicated. Stan tried to reassure himself that it would all be better after that.

He woke up around 9:30 the next morning with a mission he was finally gonna confront Gary, he figured he couldn't go over there until around one anyway, just to make sure he would be home from church.

Stan went into the kitchen to get breakfast and saw his mother sitting at the table reading the newspaper.

"Oh good morning Stan, there was something for you in the newspaper box today"

She handed over a manila envelope with his name on it.

He opened it up to reveal an 8x10 glossy photograph from Friday night.

He ran upstairs to examine it further with out his mother finding out about it.

The picture was of he and Gary kissing, it wasn't the highest quality looking like it was taken with a cell phone, but it was also quite obvious to tell who was in the picture.

On the back there was a post it note

Stan, looks like you've found someone else to kiss-K


End file.
